near death experience

This last saturday, Andy picked me up from work at about 7:00p and I told him that all I wanted in the world was a cheeseburger and please please please can we go get one. Being the kind, supportive, slightly terrified husband that he is we immediately drove to Wendy's and we got me some food (two cheeseburgers in fact. Never in my life have I eaten two burgers in one sitting. Gross). Anyway, on the way home we were behind this small nasty truck emitting a gross amount of smoke. I was halfway through my first burger and I had to put it down because the smell was so horrible. The truck turned a corner and we kept driving but the smell was getting stronger. Oh it was so awful, and my pregnant nose amplified it by a million. Suddenly I noticed that my butt was smoking. Literally, smoking. And I reacted quite calmly. AHHHHH ANDY I'M DYING WHAT IS THAT OH MY SHIZ PULL OVER THE CAR IS ON FIRE HOLY CRAP WHAT IS HAPPENING ANDY STOP THE CAR I'M SERIOUS SOMETHING BIG IS HAPPENING HOLY SHIZ HOLY SHIZ. You know, real graceful-like. I pulled out the source and Andy immediately yanked it from the outlet.

It was an adapter for my iphone I had bought for $5 off amazon. It had burned my seat and my purse. AND IT STUNK TERRIBLY. But it finally stopped glowing (yes it was glowing orange) and the smoke disappeared. But I was still yelling. So Andy pulled over and I jumped out of the car. He almost tossed it in the trash but I wanted to keep it as proof that we almost died. Kind of. But really. I kept thinking about how I used to keep that adapter plugged in in our apartment, and at Great Harvest when I was at work and what if it caught on fire there and burned down a whole building? What if? WHAT IF? Who can I sue?

Anyway, I still had a burger and a half to eat so we left the car with the windows rolled down and finished our Wendy's on a bench on main street. Turned out to be a nice dinner for the both of us. But still. NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE. We could be dead people.

"I have a new appreciation for life!" as Ross from Friends would say.

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