one month old

Rory James,

You, sweet boy, are a month old today. That floors me. Already you are filling out your clothes and are showing obvious signs of growing up. I've never enjoyed my life quite so much as I do with you. Being your mama brings an immense satisfaction that I've never felt before.

You are the happiest baby. Yes you cry, but never without a reason. Most the time you are just content to lay in my lap and stare into my face. When you sleep with your mouth open I lean in to smell your delicious sweet breath. I stroke your cheeks, I kiss your forehead, I rub your ears and play with your fingers. You are just the most adorable newborn and I love that I get to keep you all to myself.

Lately you have been sleeping pretty restlessly. Your eyes wiggle beneath your lids like you're dreaming and you fuss every few minutes. But before long you relax again. When you sleep you make these high pitched sighs that are so adorable. Your favorite sleeping place is on my chest. I love that. I love love love that that is where you fall asleep the easiest. I'd so much rather hold you during all your naps than lay you down anywhere. My productivity level is at zero, but I'm holding you as close as I can and I am completely satisfied.

Your hair is amazing. Whenever we meet new people, the first thing they comment on is your gorgeous head of thick hair. It sticks straight up for a few days after we wash it. It's so fuzzy and soft I can't stop touching it. We always know when Papa Vidmar has been holding you because his your is all greasy from him stroking it so much.

I never thought I'd be one of those ridiculous moms who coo at their babies, making funny faces and stupid noises, trying to get a response out of an obviously oblivious baby. But I am. And I'm the worst. When I wasn't watching, Andy used my phone to record me sticking out my tongue at you and talking like cookie monster. In my defense, I did get a smile out of you at one point. 

Your skin is peeling like you're shedding snakeskin. First your feet, then your hands now your face and back. It's taking all my willpower to not peel it like a sunburn. You still have some baby acne. It doesn't bother me nearly as much as I expected it would, though we might try out some infant eczema cream to clear it up. 

Your first bath was fantastic. We had to wait a long time because your umbilical stump seemed to stay on forever, and the day before it fell off you got circumcised. I held you in my lap in the bath water and you were just silently staring up at us with the biggest eyes. You LOVED that bath and didn't make a peep the entire time even when Andy accidentally dripped water in your eye. Your second bath was not nearly as great. After screaming bloody murder I pulled you out and fed you right there on the floor to calm you down and you peed all over my leg. Thanks for that. 

Your farts rock. Seriously though, they are louder than anything I could ever produce. Incredibly impressive. I can feel your stomach rumbling with gas while I feed you. You are a very gassy baby. You also pee on someone at least once a day. We are still trying to figure out how to manage your diaper changes without leaving you exposed long enough to pee on one of us.

Your lips are so tiny. So itty bitty. You have a fabulous poop face where your eyebrows go high, your eyes get all watery and your tiny little lips pout and your face gets all red. We think it's hilarious. Your eyebrows are already so expressive, though you usually are frowning pretty seriously. It's like you're trying really hard to focus. When you sneeze, you sneeze with your whole body and your arms fly up and sometimes you hit yourself in the face. Hiccups bother the crap out of you. You are always pretty fussy until they go away, which I find ironic as you used to have hiccups two or three times a day when I was pregnant with you and sometimes it drove me nuts too. 

Last week you started following us with your eyes. Sometimes when I move too quickly it startles you and it takes you a bit to find me again. I think it's hilarious. Your neck muscles are getting stronger and stronger. After a nice nap and good feeding, I hold you up and you swing your head round and round and round as though you're trying to absorb everything around you as fast as you can. When Andy holds you he does it with you and I'm pretty sure it's the cutest scene in the world.

Once you started screaming in pain while I was changing your diaper. I couldn't figure out what was wrong until I saw that you had a fistful of your own hair clenched tightly in your hand and were pulling on it with all your might. You poor dumb baby! I couldn't help but laugh a bit as I did all I could to get you to relax your arm and let go of your hair. Am I evil? 

You have my ears. There's a wiggly "dogbite" on the tip just like mine. Yours also are sprouting little hairs along the edges like an old man. Your pediatrician made fun of you for that. Your feet are exact copies of your daddy's. Exactly. You have the Vidmar opposable big toe. Your hands however, remind me of my brother's. Big long fingers with small palms, though chunkier than mine. I love your wobbly legs and itty bitty knees. I spend a lot of time wiggling your legs around.

You wake up every single day at 4am. What's that about. I watch netflix while I drowsily feed you. Everything from the emporer's new groove to 30 rock to freaks and geeks to mythbusters. It's a good thing you're not impressionable yet or you might be pretty confused from those weird shows. 

Your dad makes up new ridiculously lame songs every day to console you while he changes your diaper. It's adorable to see him interact with you. He loves you so much. When it's midnight and I'm just about ready to crash, he'll swaddle you up and lay you on his belly while he talks to you. He's so great with you and I can't wait to see you two become best buddies.

I love that you are so healthy, Rory boy. I love that we get to keep you forever and that I get to watch you grow up every day. Being your mama is the most intimidating responsibility, but I'll take it on gladly because you are just so friggin adorable. I love you buddy.

See all "letters to Rory".

1 comment:

  1. he's perfect rachel. I love these shots of him.


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